Q: Do you know anything about emotional dependence? Preferably in relationships outside of marriage?!!! I am not married so I need to know about this subject in terms of non-marital relationships! Thank you and God Bless.
A: Jennifer. I know a lot about emotional dependence. However, your question is too general. For example, did you know that all of us are emotionally dependent except for the psychopaths, schizophrenics, autistics and a few other mentally ill types? I think you may be asking about being compulsively dependent. If so, you may be referring to the way that people try to use other people to act as surrogate parents when they haven’t been lucky enough to have sufficiently developed mature personalities. When people unfortunately receive less than optimal parenting, they often don’t develop the “internal parent” part of themselves that helps them to feel valuable and valid on their own. Without this piece of themselves fully developed, they need to supplement their sense of worth with approval or nurturance from others. If this is the case for you then you may want to see a therapist of your own sex or check out the organization Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous. – Good luck, Bryce Kaye